Today I was told "NO" by a 6 year old, told by a 5th grader he "stripped Barbies in his spare time" and a 5th grader told me "He visited a strip club over summer" Yikes...what have I gotten myself into???? I was also asked where my accent was and laughed at for using "Y'all" frequently!
Ok...Ok...so I know I will be ill pressed to get anyone to feel sorry for me. And truly know...I am not one to think I have it "hard" by any means...but let's be honest...after having 3 months off from work...it would be hard for anyone to go back. 3 months where I traveled to the beach, went to Seattle, went to Annapolis, drove cross country, spent 3 weeks vegging in San Diego...yes...the harsh reality of a "schedule" is debilitating to me right now. While I do like routine...I just like it to be the routine that I decide :)
So today was the first day with kids....slightly different than the past 3 days of training. I think part of the stress, shock, and exhaustion comes from forgetting how mentally and physically draining working with children is. Also, the atmosphere and setting is a little different than the structure of the typical classroom. So...finding a balance and learning the ropes will take some time. I guess I was a fool to think I would go in skipping, smiling, and it be so easy....haha. I am still excited, still wanting to be there...just readjusting my mind frame and realize that it is work, not play and while it can still be fun...it will be challenging at times.
Luckily, I do love the schedule of not going until 2pm. I was able to sleep in to the usual 9ish, take Roxie to not only the beach but also dog park and enjoy some lazy time on the couch watching my idol...Kelly Ripa (duh...of course)
Tomorrow is a noon start time but I think it will still be an enjoyable morning.
I also came to the realization yesterday that it was one month until I turn 27....YIKES! That seems insanely old...so close 30. Oh...all that I imagined I would be doing at 27. I can still remember looking at my sister who is 8 years older and thinking "Wow....when I am her age I will be doing this and that" Funny how life turns out. Pretty sure at 8, 12, 18, and even 22 I never thought this is where I would be at 27. Not that it is good nor bad...but just proof life rarely turns out how you expect it to. Part of the fun I guess...although I am certain there are people who plan and are living the life they always imagined for themselves...can't help to be a little jealous of those people sometimes. The unknown is fun but the certain is also comforting as well. Being happy in your own life is easier said than done for a lot of people....it is a hard thing to admit when you aren't happy...it can be humbling...it was hard for me to do and I am lucky enough I had the opportunity and ability to do something about it. Not that I have everything figured out instantly...San Diego is great but it is no miracle :) But....there is a lot to be said for changing your environment to improve your quality of life.
Oh I could forever peruse the Self Help section in the bookstore, or spend years in therapy I am sure...until I get it all figured out...I will continue my medicine of beach, books, and a great ocean view. Seems to be working already.....
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